Letting It Happen Versus Making It Happen

Sometimes a softer touch is what pushes you through

Sometimes the best thing you can do is get out of your own way. I like to think about this as transitioning from making it happen to letting it happen — whatever the proverbial “it” may be

Making it happen, or pushing on something until it gives, has its place. It’s often very effective. But it seems that regardless of the discipline — be it weightlifting, running, learning, teaching, coaching, romance, parenting, or business — the closer you get to crossing an important threshold the less making it happen works. If anything, in these situations trying to make it happen often backfires. You get injured, you get stuck, you become too pushy. These are the times when it’s best to let things happen instead.

Letting things happen means stepping back a bit. It means having patience. It doesn’t mean you stop working toward whatever it is you’re doing altogether. But it does mean lightening your touch. As the famous track and field coach Bud Winter once said, sometimes you just need to “relax and win.”

Sometimes the best thing you can do is get out of your own way.

And yet it’s not that simple. A common trap is when you think you’re letting it happen but…